The Word of Chaos

I was up far too early this morning studying for a test in my Compiler Design class. I decided to take a quick break and check out what’s new on Facebook. I glanced over at the left side of the screen to find an advertisement.

“Problems meeting attractive females?”

Define attractive… Problems attracting mean girls…? Nope… Otherwise, maybe…

“This guide will give you a helping start.”

Oh, really?

“Click to see more.”

Alright, Mr. Smug FaceSpace advertisement. You have my attention. I am obviously not capable of picking up girls myself. Help me to know what girls like to talk about since they’re obviously not into Shin Chan, Legos, or my high score in Tetris! *click*

What? Internal Server Error? There can’t be an internal server error! How am I supposed to meet girls without this website? It’s not possible! My love life is in ruin! Wait… I’m a computer nerd! Coolchicktalk needs my help! I must act! E-mail power activate!

Webmaster,

Greetings! I am sorry that we must meet under these grave circumstances, but all is not right in our world.
Se
Although I am quite sexy and continuously roll a high charisma, I have problems talking to girls. Yes, I know. It’s hard to believe! Someone with my knowledge of Middle Earth and Linux should NEVER have this problem. Sadly, it is so.

When trying to utilize your service, I received a server error. I am very concerned about this problem! I need your guidance, Keeper of Lady Secrets!

I would like to offer my assistance in this matter. I am familiar with Apache, Linux, Twinkies, Dungeons and Dragons, Halo 3, Google, C++, Python, The Sims, Tacos, the opposite of female acceptance, being sexy, FreeBSD, World of Warcraft (3 LvL 70’s!), and, last but not least, basic addition.

Thank you for your attention to this most serious matter.

Sincerely,

Lek Licec (my Elven name!)

Soon, all will be right in the world again!!!